Chatter Tongue Gossip

Thoughts on Love, Sex & Entertainment

Jon Gosselin – ATTEMPTING TO GET HIS OWN SHOW

Duschtard, Jon Gosseling has now been reported to be trying to land his own reality TV show.  In preparation for his attempt at a solo career is why, supposedly the chubby dad of 8, has been chillaxn with Michael Lohan and his entourage of younger skanks women…

 Jon holds fast to his claims that his main concern is his children, but he is focusing on his private and his professional life. 

Translation from the Jon Gosselin Dictionary: Jon knows he has to say his main concern is the children or he will look like an even bigger asshole than he already does…  But his main focus is trying to establish himself as a “Stud for Hire” but so far has only been able to land skanky drug addicts….  He has also realized he ain’t gonna get as much money from his divorce as he once thought, so he better get busyrubbing noses, or any other part that he can, with some influential people and drop the drug addicted skanks that he has been porking up to this point! 

He is looking into some major international endorsement deals and it looks like he is going to have his own show.” He still has 30 Jon & Kate Plus 8 episodes left on the 40-episode order TLC placed, and the network has no comment on Jon’s new reality-show scheming.

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July 25, 2009 Posted by | Bad Parenting, Celebrity Gossip, Funny, Jon & Kate Plus 8 | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Jon Gosselin’s new “friend” – SHE CAN WORK A BONG TOO

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Will Hailey Glassman trip ever end?  It doesn’t look like its going to stop anytime soon or even slow down…  Although, the longer the trip lasts the better Hailey Glasspipeman likes it!

It’s no secret that Goodtime Hailey,  Jon’s new “friend”  likes her share of the chronic. But in a new video airing on tonight’s Inside Edition, she shows that she knows her way around a bong, too.  She has so many facits!

In another clip, she’s smoking the peace pipe, like a Native American,  pantless on the couch and later passed out. umm Classy!

Of course, it seems like she and Jon are ahead of the game and tried to do damage control with their family-friendly playground outing yesterday…  The two froliced around in the Harlem Harriman State Park in New York.  She picked a lovely flower and put it behind his ear and she swang while Jon pushed her….  Glasspipeman told Jon she wanted be as high as she could, so Jon pushed her as hard as his little Asian arms could push!  But I question if swinging was what she had in mind.

July 21, 2009 Posted by | Celebrity Gossip, Jon & Kate Plus 8 | , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Jon Gosselin – SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE

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It was reported Saturday night, Jon Gosselin was photographed with his penis hanging out at Accademia di Vino with some new blonde that was neither Kate Gosselin,  Hailey Glasspipeman nor Lindsay Lohan.

She was later identified as Kate Major, a reporter from Star, and there was talk of her “flirting shamelessly with Jon.”celebrity_birthday_party_LC1_0004_Layer_16_full

No! It couldn’t be, right? How could he leave his piece of ass secret fiancée and all-around elegant 22-year-old lady? This new Kate character didn’t even have a thongscandalous Facebook ready for the Internet to mine for porn party photos or a story of getting kicked out of fat camp for sneaking Panda Express. In other words, she just wasn’t good enough in bed for our Jon.

And just like that, Jon and Hailey soothed our rash fears and reunited after a week apart for a lovely trot stroll through Harlem Harriman State Park in the ghetto New York. They always know just what to do to keep us talking, sort of like another certain couple who shall not be named.  Adam and Kris?

According to voyers onlookers, the two were not shy about their flachulents love.

They held hands, hugged and sucked kissed; Hailey picked her nose a flower and placed it behind Jon’s ear and they played with each others genitals on the swings.

How romantic, how beautiful. Just imagine if there had been no paparazzi to capture the love radiating from these two. The world would be a safer darker place, for sure.

As for the timeline of when the pair started screwingdating, a source on J.Goss damage control Bull Shits swears to People that the devoted husband was masturbating “heartbroken, totally heartbroken” when Kate told him she was done with his small Asian cock  him, which actually “came in out of her mouth the blue.”

The two had been separated for a year prior to Kate screwing her body guard filing for divorce, according to the source, during which time Jon was not allowed to sleep in the couple’s bedroom. That was when he started partying, but the dating stuff didn’t begin until after the divorce papers were filed.

Nice try at demonizing Kate, source, but we all know they’re both the worst.

July 21, 2009 Posted by | Celebrity Gossip, Jon & Kate Plus 8 | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Jon Gosselin – GIVES DEANNA HUMMEL & HAILEY GLASSMAN A RIDE

Sorry guys, I found this picture and I had to use it! Jon gives Deanna and Haily a ride to the curb to be picked up with the rest of the trash.

July 18, 2009 Posted by | Celebrity Gossip, Jon & Kate Plus 8 | , , | Leave a comment